BYE 2020!

Wrote this on New Year's Eve, Dec 31 2020.

No plans of doing year enders for this %*#@ of a year, but my past blog entries appeared this morning on my Facebook memories and my senti self can't stand letting this year go by without proper closure.

Having forgotten how to write year-enders, I decided to read my 2019 entry first. I actually wrote a 2020 goals post, and even though I stayed at home 90% of the time since March, how funny that some of them I was still able to achieve, albeit in different form! 

(Purple Text - My early 2020, pre-pandemic self)

2020, the year you've seen different angles of my room for the first time! Haha! 

In photo: Celebrating Jungkook's birthday by joining 3 cupsleeves events; 

nowhere to go but still dressed up as Kdrama girl Ko Mun-Yeong for a brand posting; 

and a post-jog mirror selfie.

1) Health is Wealth. I am turning 34 this month, and have to reconsider my food choices, fitness life and even my sleeping schedule (kahit na Kdrama is life, haha). 

In April, I started having anxiety attacks, amplified most at night. I was super open about it on my Instagram stories, and received several advice to do breathing exercises. 

I started doing simple, Youtube-guided yoga, and finished a "21 Days of Abundance" meditation challenge.

Naalala ko pa nga I think 3 or 4 months since April I have an actual DAILY workout sched! I stopped at around August which up to now I am still regretting coz I lost the momentum fully. Few weeks ago, I started fixing my eating habits by going on intermittent fasting. Hope I can get my workout groove back this month.

2) Watch ASTRO and BTS Live.

Aside from traveling, concerts and fan gatherings are the things that I miss the most in my "past life". Luckily, I was still able to watch ASTRO and BTS concerts even with this pandemic!

My first online paid concert experience was BTS Bang Bang Con, then ASTRO's WWW. They even projected my IG photo post for the Aroha event segment! Wah!

Latter part of the year, I also watched the 2-day concert of BTS' MOTS ON:E, and was given the opportunity to be part of the virtual audience for Day 2!

3) Go to a country I haven't been to.

The only thing on my list I wasn't able to do. But in January, I also visited to 2 cities in Korea that I haven't seen (Sokcho and Jumunjin). 

4) Shake up my wardrobe! I've been holding an online closet sale since last week to save up for my birthday trip. 

Sold most of my bags and clothes at the start of the lockdown, and haven't fully replenish my closet since. Most of the stuff I bought this year are either loungewear or BTS related pieces, so nashake talaga ang wardrobe ko! 😂

5) As mentioned earlier, be more active again in my blog. Bring back the 2017-2018 Anagon blogger! 

Wala ako masyado nasulat this year, but I'll give it to myself for finishing my 20 Days in Korea travel blogs.

I also took the 25-day Instagram challenge this December aka IGMAS, which in a way felt like doing micro blogs. Will take that as achievement nadin for this year!

Recorded the most mundane everyday happenings, my Bangtan Budols, and my 2020 achievement as a fan girl: Be featured as an ARMY in Readers Digest! 

6) Personal Project: Travel in Korea for a month. And record daily activities in vlogging format.

Something that I am thankful for this 2020 was that I was given the chance to travel to Korea for 20 days before the lockdown happened. I am thankful now that I pushed through with this trip, I was even planning on delaying it for Spring para di masyado malamig. 

There are days when I have flashes of memories from my Seoul goshiwon-life (small rooms in Korea), and can feel that bottomless pit in my tummy from travel and adventures sepanx.

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to vlog during this trip. I did have IGTV posts for most of them, some I posted while I was still in Korea!

7) Personal Project: Attend at least 5 random classes and workshops (art, cooking, etc). 

Before the lockdown, my friends and I were able to attend a soy candle making workshop! Ang saya nito because it was a time when the Crash Landing On You Kdrama was all the rage, and scented candles became "in" because of Yoon Seri! Haha. We were supposed to attend a latte art class, but that one was cancelled and refunded na huhu.

Enter our favorite school for 2020... COURSERA! Ang dami ko naging "schoolmates" sa Yonsei University because of this website discovery! I finished 2 basic Korean language courses by dedicating my mornings to just this.

Not classes, but this year I also had the chance to revive my passion for crafting. There's diamond painting, embroidery, beads, air clay, digital art, actual painting, travel memories photo books, etc. 

(skipping to #10)

10) Start a long-term business.

I made my own Hobi inspired bracelets, tapos nagka keychain version pa sya, tapos naging customizable. I was busy with these things for several months which made me happy and accomplished.

Thank you to the first person who sent me a DM asking if I can customize a JHope bracelet for her too. She was in quarantine for testing positive with Covid, and these little things made her happy.

This year, I was also able to pull-off 3 cupsleeves events (CSE) @ home. I was participating in so many BTS cupsleeves events during this pandemic, minsan 3 at a time pa for one birthday, but on my 8th I decided to create my own. 

When Jimin's birthday was coming last October, my initial target was just 20 participants. I ended up with 50! We kept growing for every event, with 130 during Jin Day, and the most recent, 156 for Taehyung Day!

In short, I just want to be healthy in all ways, to have a purpose for my social media presence and not just post because I am pressured to, to have a quality and loving community--and create something of value to people who choose to follow me, and to be stable financially so I can do more and be more for my family. 

Grabe yung goals ko when this year started. I can feel in my tone that I was so hopeful and determined to make 2020 the best! Now I can't even think of anything uplifting to end this post, knowing a new year doesn't mean COVID will magically vanish. 

But from the bottom of this wornout heart, thank you for the experiences that toughened me, thank you for teaching me to appreciate what's in front of me, and to SEE what is truly important when things that are seemingly permanent can be taken away in an instant. 

I also learned to see myself beyond all the layers I've built around myself the past years--without all the travels, stripping off my work, who am I? Staying at home in this big "world reset" made me think a lot about these things.

Happy New Year guys! No goals yet but will try to pick up my journal one of these days to self-reflect privately. Will continue praying for everyone's health and happiness. ❤

In photo: Packing boxes for shipment with the help of my parents during Jin day (October), 

We had 4 birthdays at home in 2020! Ako lang ang naka birthday pa sa labas (December), 

and me crying over Dynamite MV when I first watched it during its Youtube world premier! (August)